Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Randomize
