When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
