If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize
