I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
