I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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