Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Randomize
