He disabled his match.com account in front of me
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize
