Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
