i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
