I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize