She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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