i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
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