Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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