On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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