We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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