Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Randomize