Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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