We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
