I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
