Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Non-Jews are for practice
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity�
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Randomize
