Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Randomize
