You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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