i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
she smelled like a LAN party
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Randomize
