you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
do nipples grow back?
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