Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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