Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Randomize
