Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
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