So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
