Whod you bang
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
should my penis look like a turkey
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
