Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
