their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
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