like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
