oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
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