you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Come on in and take your pants off
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