Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Randomize
