Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
