haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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