I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
