garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
If that was your dad, he is hot
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
Randomize
