dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Randomize
