STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Randomize
