the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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