you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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