he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
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