He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
