what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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