No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
