i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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