YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
