Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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